I’m not a perfect mother – in fact I am basically just putting all of the pieces together as I go. If I have learned anything in this past year – it’s that I don’t always have to have control. You see, I’m kind of a control freak. I like things to be a certain way, go a certain way, basically just go my way. Which is a bad characteristic I know. But, little man {the one in the cute b-day hat} has taught me that life isn’t about controlling every situation – it’s about embracing every situation.
I remember the first few months with Wyatt – anytime we’d go anywhere I’d do my best to make sure he didn’t cry because when he did I would immediately get embarrassed and start passing out apologies. How silly was I? William would always say, “Kendall, he is just a baby!” But for some reason, I felt like all eyes were on me – that people were looking at me and thinking “Oh my goodness, look at that girl just letting her baby scream – she’s got to be the worst mother..,” as I would frantically start shaking a toy in front of Wyatt’s face or begin fumbling with the bottle cap as I tried to feed him.
The problem was – I cared too much about what people thought.
And that obsession with caring got real old – real quick. I realized I can’t live life that way – afraid of what others would think. Wyatt was just a baby {and still is} and people {including myself} have to realize that.
We aren’t always going to have days that run completely smooth.
There are going to be times when Wyatt is screaming, and I just have to do my best to handle the situation the best that I can.
Because I am doing my best. And that’s just got to be good enough.
I am reading this post, thinking it sounds so familiar! Sounds just like me! I just want everything to be “perfect”-my version of perfect!
My kids are 16 and 11 now. When they were young, I had the same issue with crying – I just couldn’t let it happen:) Seeing mothers with their children sitting in the grocery cart crying (or worse – running all over the place!!) drove me absolutely nuts! My girls were always within arms reach and always walking right next to me – just admitting to that makes me sounds a little crazy:)
I am glad you were able to find a happy medium…
I am so glad my girls turned out to be good kids despite their crazy, control freak mom:)
It just makes me embarassed – and it’s so silly. I think that there is a little “give” room with the situation. A little crying is okay – but continuous yelling isn’t fair to everyone else. And I know what you mean about kids running about – I see that all the time and it drives me nuts too! I’m so scared they’ll get hurt!
This was me with my oldest. By the time the third came along I was well over those worries. Sometimes you just can’t help it. My husband and I would take turns walking around outside or take a quick trip to the bathroom.
William and I do that too. Sometimes a walk around the store just seems to help – or some fresh air. And like you said – sometimes it really can’t be helped! Wyatt is teething like crazy and there’s just nothing I can do but work with him – he’s going to be fussy no matter what. xo.
That’s right… amazing how much these kids teach us right? kendall he is so so cute..and 1 already- so crazy! Don’t blink..it goes by way too fast! Enjoy them, enjoy them small. Eat it up! ๐
Thank you! I know it is all happening way too fast! I’m trying to enjoy it all while I can! ๐
You are doing your best, and you’re doing an amazing job!!! I feel exactly the same way. It’s not a good feeling, but little by little I’m realizing how not in control I am. It’s hard, but also a little freeing.
I completely agree – it is kind of freeing! Just realizing that you dont have to put so much pressure on yourself to be perfect is a wonderful thing ๐
i know exactly how you feel! i’m sure you are doing a great job!
Awe, thank you! That means so much! xo.
Happy Belated First Birthday to your little one!!!! Adorable picture;)
Thanks Julie! I think he had a pretty good day {I was the only one crying on his actual birthday – lol}.
thank you for this post!!! I love your baby’s name ๐
No problem Jessica! And thank you for your sweet words!
I love this post! It’s so true! There will always be people thinking things like that about you, but learning to ignore is such an accomplishment!
Your birthday boy is too cute!
https://hopefullittleone.blogspot.com/
Thank you Jessica! It was a huge step! I’m just happy I realized it early on before I let it drive me crazy. It’s just not worth it, ya know?
I will perhaps share a somewhat unpopular opinion, but here goes – I know that babies cry sometimes. I don’t expect babies to never cry – that would be silly. What I think can and should happen though is that in particular situations, a baby that begins to cry should be taken somewhere else for a few minutes until they are calm. I don’t mean at the first peep, but if the parents aren’t able to help the child calm down in a minute or less- in situations like – a church service, a wedding, a movie, a restaurant. I don’t enjoy listening to a baby cry in the grocery store, but hey – it happens, and I’ve been on the frazzled parent end of the crying/screaming scene. I have two boys (now grown) and I know that sometimes you just can’t help them get quiet, and also that crying is the baby’s way of communicating – but I think it is not a good idea to just let them scream and really detract from events like the ones I mentioned. So, I’m going to go duck and hide in a corner now! : )
Lynne, first I would like to thank you for sharing your opinion! I really loved reading your response – it’s always good to look at and learn from a different perspective. I completely agree with you – I don’t let Wyatt cry for minutes straight – it’s just not fair to everyone else. I feel like going for a walk definitely does help! See, you don’t have to hide in a corner! I completely agree with you – I’ve never met anyone that enjoyed the sound of a crying baby. ๐
a good thing about having so many kids is that I don’t have any time to worry or care what people think….and with so many kids I learned not to be pointing any fingers…they could soon be pointing right back!
Good point Annmarie! ๐
I can totally relate. I was the same with our first, but you’re right, you’re doing your best and babies cry, period!! Love the new look! Xoxo
Thanks Kristina! I do too! ๐