Today’s post comes from Kathy – if you would like to follow her story more – please head over to her blog Sparkles and a Stove!

Speech Delay: When The Words Aren’t Enough

My son talks. He doesn’t have speech delay or problems speaking. At least that’s what I thought this past March when my almost 3 year old son was having difficulty at preschool and the director of the school mentioned speech delay as a possible cause for some of his problems. Don’t get me wrong I did think there was something going on as we had come to the conclusion school was not the best place for him at the moment because of his constant pushing of other students. I just didn’t think speech delay was at the root of it. After all he could say literally hundreds of words! Here he is at his Meet the Teacher Day. I didn’t know at the time he wouldn’t be able to finish the year.

Knowing he needed help of some kind because he was not able to function in a classroom with his peers or at play dates, I called a state funded program the preschool referred me to even if I disagreed with what they thought the diagnosis was. The program provides help such as speech and occupational therapy to qualifying children based on developmental delays.

The four hour evaluation to qualify my son for the help I know he needed for SOMETHING was both eye opening and heartbreaking to watch. My boy who I knew was able to say hundreds of words could not answer age appropriate questions or express himself when the evaluators talked to him. They kept having to ask him the same questions multiple times to be sure he didn’t understand or couldn’t answer and he became tearful and frustrated not understanding how to answer. He kept saying “Want done! Want done!” and it was everything I could do not to ask them to leave our home and scoop him up and comfort him.
It broke my heart for him, but it also made me realize just what was happening at school. At school of course, their whole day is based on communication and answering questions and if he couldn’t do that, then it was no wonder there was misbehavior and frustration! I was so sad to pull him out of school as he loved school and loved to learn but at the end, even he was frustrated and on what was his last day he asked not to go.

At home he was able to use words to communicate, but it never occurred to me it was all vocabulary and little conversation and almost no answering of questions that weren’t yes or no. We answered yes when the pediatrician asked if he knew X number of words at each check up and we presumed he was developing normally.

 
Despite his above average vocabulary for his age, that evaluation made me realize my son definitely had speech problems! I learned speech is so much more than just words. It is being able to use those words and communicate with others using those words which is what he wasn’t able to do and was causing him tremendous frustration.
He qualified and received help from the state program until he turned 3. A speech therapist came out once a week to work with him and to show me things I could be doing at home to encourage conversation and answering questions. They laid a beautiful foundation in our short time with them and helped us transition into private therapy for the summer. He is speaking in more complex sentences, can answer most questions or at least gets less frustrated when he needs help with answering. In private therapy, we go to a therapy center where he learns through games and activities. He still gets frustrated sometimes but has fun too and has really bonded with his therapist.
One of the times that really exemplifies how far he’s come and is one that will stay with me forever as a turning point was a trip to the zoo. We came upon an antelope crunching on some leaves. In the past he would have pointed out “Deer!” (He still thinks they’re deer.) Instead he said “That deer (is) eating grass!” I had to take a deep breath to fight back the tears. He didn’t just have words anymore. He was beginning to be able to use them!
Outlook: His strides have been just short of miraculous for our family but there is still work to do with his speech and some sensory issues, but both we and his therapists are optimistic he will be able to start kindergarten with his peers in a little less than 2 years. He will continue private therapy for the summer and has been accepted into a preschool within the school district for children with speech delays for the fall.

My mother’s instinct was telling me something was not right with my son when he could not remain in preschool like the other children. It is very hard to admit that there may be a problem with your child’s development but getting him help has been an enormous blessing to our family and he is so much happier, more confident, and less frustrated. Speech delay can be related to many things. If you have any concerns about your child, I encourage you to speak with your pediatrician.

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