How I Found My Plus Size Confidence

Keep scrolling to hear about How I Found My Plus Size Confidence!

Hello, friends!

I just returned from a work trip on Thursday, and am finally settling back into the routine of being home. Wyatt got sick while I was gone, so I came home to snuggles and comforting my little man to get him back on his feet. The work trip I was on was to do a little modeling for a plus size clothing company, and I can’t wait to share more (and photos) in a few short months.

But, while I was gone, something happened. I found my confidence in being plus size. Before I go into how I found my plus size confidence, I need to tell you where I was mentally before the trip. It’s no secret I’m plus-sized. And it’s no secret that I’ve been trying to lose some weight lately. But what I wasn’t open and honest about was the way I viewed myself – and the mental bashing I was doing to myself on a daily basis.

— You’ve got a double chin.

— You’re stomach looks huge.

— You’d be so much cuter if you lost weight.

— Your thighs are too big.

And the list goes on, and on.

Each morning when I’d get dressed, I’d choose sweat pants and sweatshirts to hide myself from myself. I wouldn’t feel good, I never put on clothes that made me feel good. And I don’t know if the shift from thinking this way happened when I made a leap to cut off 16 inches of hair, get it dyed blonde, and shake things up a bit (and realize how much better I felt when I made time for myself) or what. But a shift HAS happened, and the trip I went on has a lot to do with it.

The ladies I spent time with on the trip were so confident in themselves, and their confidence started to rub off on me slowly but surely. They weren’t bashing themselves, and when I looked at them, I saw nothing but beauty. Beauty in how they looked, acted, and held themselves. It was so incredibly inspiring – and it made me realize — life is too short to hold myself back.

I hold myself back too often based on my own personal vision.

The Kendall I see, is NOT the Kendall everyone else sees.

The burden of my anxiety alter ego has created a version of  myself that is distorted, a version that is not the real me. It takes every flaw and negative thing I see in myself, and it magnifies it in my mind.

The real me is kind, loving, and funny. The real me is respectful, & loves her family. The real me is plus-size, and looks darn adorable. Life isn’t about the number on the scale or the heat rash between your thighs, it’s about loving who you are on the inside, living a healthy lifestyle, and letting your heart radiate out into the world.

Because your kindness, your confidence, your love — that’s what people will see.

I feel more confident and more beautiful than I EVER have.

And it wasn’t because someone told me I was beautiful – it was because I TOLD MYSELF I WAS BEAUTIFUL.

I told myself to let go of expectations, comparison, and doubt. I told myself to embrace who I am inside and out, and to show a little respect for myself, because I deserve it.

So, if you’re like I was – if you’re never happy with how you look, or how you view yourself — change it! Spend a few minutes each day doing something that fills YOUR cup and makes YOU happy.

I feel confident and happy when:

• I’m with my family.
• I’m at the water (any body of water will do, even a puddle, LOL).
• I style my hair and take time for myself to get ready.
• I put on a comfortable & cute outfit that makes ME feel good.
• I’m laughing!
• I get lost in a good book.

I came across the quote below, and it really resonated with me, so I wanted to share it with you! Take your time to read it, and soak in every word. I guarantee it will shake and move something in you, too.

 

“growing into your future… requires a dedication to caring for yourself as if you were rare and precious. which you are. and regarding all life around you as equally so. which it is.” – Victoria Moran

Much love & body confidence, xox.

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